Teach love not war

New year. And as usual, us teechas are required to "teach properly" to make sure the kids understand. We must be able to relate what they learn to their experience. And we must also make get the kids to think too.

Now how on earth do you get them to understand about the present simple tense?

"Kids, do you see the sun come up everyday?"

"Yes teecha!"

"O.k! So when you want to want to describe the sun coming up every day, you use the present simple tense. So you say, the sun rises every morning. You understand?"

"Yes teecha!"

And when you mark their exercises, they get it all wrong.

So I tried a rather ingenius method.

"Kids. When you grow up, do you want to get married?"

I get a mixed reaction but overall the answer was yes.

"So what do you have to do before you get married?"

"Get a girlfriend!"

Gee. My students are really smart.

"And what do you say to her?"

"I love you!"

"If you say I loves you, is that right?"

"No teecha!"

Then I explained that to fall in love, you need the right grammar. If you say "I loves you", you will be turned down flat.

"If you say to your GF I loved you sekalinya kana tampar. Why?"

"Because ia cakap loved teecha!"

"Good! So you must use the right agreement and the right tense."

Then I proceded to drill them the use of the present simple tense. The kids gladly went along chanting:

I love you. You love me. He loves you. She loves me. We love you. They love me. It loves me.

And that ladies and gentlemen, is how you teach the present simple tense.

Next topic: Past simple tense. We'll talk about break-ups.