Diet Schmiet

Holiday..aaaaaahhhh! Well, my holiday is more like ouch, eeow, yikes, grrrrr. Not exactly a way to relax but I have joined aerobics class and I go to all of em types. All those working days I spent walking up and down the stairs had done no justice to my build. So holiday is downsize me time. Serves me right for telling fat jokes in class!

Once during puasa, a boy kept coming up to the teacher's table and teased me, "Teacher, teacher puasa kah?" Of course being a woman, I find that question totally sensitive so I always answered indirectly. "Do I look like I've eaten something?" I was propped on the teacher's desk, had no energy and gave orders in an almost inaudible voice.

Ss: Ha, ha..teacher inda tahan puasa!

There's no such thing as a private conversation in class. Other students always butt in when I'm NOT teaching.

After the umpteenth time he asked me the question, I replied "You better keep quiet cause you're starting to look good to eat!" Unfortunately I had forgotten that he was obese so he took it the wrong way especially when the other kids laughed at my remark. So every time he wrote a composition, I was a fat, burger-eating woman who always got run over by a car. Oh yeah, he was the driver. He never stopped to help me but just drove off with a "ha,ha,ha!"

Then there was another time when I reprimanded my whole class for using when instead of went.

T: Kamu pikir samakah ertinya tu? What is the meaning of when? Went? It's not even pronounced the same! You must sound the 't' at the end. It's the same like words ending with -ed!

Then some smart-ass kid decided to be funny.

S: Teecha, kalau died atu di sabut diet tah tu ah!

T: No! A diet is something that you should be on!

Again I forgot that my student was fat and the whole class laughed.

S: Awu cherrr..na papa. Kurus ku ni kaang udah cuti.

I was only trying to explain the difference in meaning between died and diet but got into hot soup.

If I decide to quit my job, I think I can make a good drill sergeant at fat camp. But I gotta lose the pounds first!